And This Is What Happens When I Have No Radio

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I think.

Scary stuff.

So. I am driving along to work, with no radio, cd player or clock. You ask why? Because my half-brother, who I have not seen in eight years came into town and after chatting merrily for three minutes, he needed something to keep him busy. So he offered to fix my stereo which has been having severe problems. In the fixing of the stereo he discovered it had been improperly installed and advised I get it professionally fixed. Since he kindly disconnected the fuse(? or was it something else electric that I do not understand?) I now have no radio, no clock and NO MUSIC to keep me from thinking.

So. That leads me to pondering what exactly we shall wear for family pictures. Since this brother has shown up, my father thought it prudent to get family pictures taken with all of us. All. Of. Us. That would be four whole children, two half children, two step children and a nephew. Plus the parentals. And yes, we plan our outfits before family pictures. Because we are just color coordinated like that. And normally, this task would not be such a challenge, except my hair is SO incredibly dark, that I have to think about these things. Not wanting to look goth in the family picture that will be preserved for decades to come.

And yes, these matters were weighing heavily on my mind. Leaving me quite thankful that I was not talking on two phones at the same time, as I was yesterday on my way home.

But, it allowed me to channel my wrath towards the lady who was trying to merge into my lane, but WOULDN'T merge. I hate that. I slowed down for her, and she WOULD NOT MERGE. No lady, I am not going to come to a complete stop just so you can inch your little Ford Focus hiney into traffic. And you had the NERVE to give me a dirty look when I drove past. I SLOWED DOWN FOR YOU! What ELSE to you expect me to do? GET IN YOUR CAR AND DRIVE IT FOR YOU? While I will freely admit I would do a vastly superior job, I AM BUSY DRIVING MINE. Thank you! While I can talk on two phones at the same time, I cannot, nor WILL I even ATTEMPT to drive two cars at once. I HOPE YOUR LITTLE, UGLY FORD HINEY GETS SMUSHED WHILE TRYING TO MERGE.

So, yeah. About that stereo. I really need to get it fixed.

Yes. I realize this is a written tribute to the accusations that our family (er, me) acts like we are on crack, without the slimming side effects.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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