It's been a long day. I am closing in on twelve hours. I am ready to go home.

The whole day has dragged by miserably. Since Monday, I have felt incredibly overwhelmed and underinformed. I want to scream and cry. Actually, come to think of it, last night, at the very thought of going to work, I sprouted tears. Not a good sign.

Lack of sleep and abundance of caffeine give me that nervously irritable edge. If that weren't bad enough, every single person seems to feel the need to anger me in such a way that every other word I think to say is an expletive.

Sample conversation in my head:

Salesperson: (whiny voice) "But I don't have to finish filling out the paperwork until YOU are finished."

Me: (snarling) "No, motherfucker, if you did your Goddamned job correctly in the first place, I would be able to do MY fucking job so you could shut your Goddamned pie hole and I would never have to listen to you spew shit again. UNFORTUNATELY, YOU DIDN'T. WHICH IS WHY I AM SHOVING THIS ENTIRE REAM OF PAPERWORK UP YOUR LAZY ASS."

My actual response is a little closer to: "Leave. It. On. My. Desk. Leave now."

Besides that, my computer has been malfunctioning all day, I am ravenously hungry and I want to leave more than anything in the world. I am supposed to leave in seven minutes. But, guess what? There is one last sale for me to close.

I'll close it. The customers will love me. I will charm them and smile. They will think I am the most darling lovable thing since--kittens.

As long as their not psychic.