Is It Worth It?

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Lately, as I have been taking on more projects, I realize I am being very short with people and rather irritable. Is it because I am stressed, or merely an irritable person?

The reason I take on so many projects is that I am honing myself to be the best I can be. Right now I am building the foundation for the rest of my life, I would prefer to overdo it, rather than looking back and saying "I wish I had done more and worked harder."

Is it necessary to sacrifice me being pleasent and me having a sucessful future? Or was that a huge mental leap that only I got, mainly because there is a enormous disconnect between my brain and my spinal cord?

Anyway. I think this only makes sense to me.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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