The end of the year is when you get to look back over the past twelve months and disect every embarassing, stupid and horrid thing you have done. It is also a time to see how much you have grown and changed. This year has definately been an interesting one. I have changed, though I don't know if it is for the better.

Last night, Joy and I had one of those great little sisterly chats where the sister helps you gain perspective on life in general. It also prompted allot of thought on my part, which is normally quite fearsome.

Over the past year, my priorities have become ever so slightly skewed. When she asked me what the purpose of my life is, instead of spitting out some sort of unconvincing canned line, I really thought. What IS the purpose of my life? (Profound, eh?)

The past few months, I have sought to make myself a interesting person. (Aiming high, aren't we?) From what did that goal perpitrate? Because, it is much easier to reach out to people and connect with them when you are multi-faceted. But, you cannot let your priority become BEING INTERESTING because you completely lose focus and push people aside for projects. Thus, nullifying all your wonderful intentions. This might seem quite basic for some of you, but for me this is quite revolutionary.

I have also seen myself morph into this caustic, sarcastic, cynical and biting person. At times, it is nice and conventient, because I will be the first to tell you what I REALLY feel. But, it leaves few people who know that deep down. DEEP DOWN. Ok, THE DARKEST RECESSES. I am truly a nice person. After awhile, the facade blends with who you really are and then YOU BECOME A BITCH. And I am rapidly getting there. Anyway.


I am now taking suggestions on how to make myself a nicer person.