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And This Is The Reason I Do Not Play Sports

Published 28.1.05 by Porkchop | E-mail this post

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While to some, this remains a mystery, I have just made yet another exhibit of why it is not wise. I cannot muster up the coordination to walk down a icy handicap ramp. I manage to fall and slide on my butt. To. The. Very. Bottom. Of. The. Mile. Long. Ramp.



If this does not shed a bit of light my reasoning, you are hopeless.

3 Responses to “And This Is The Reason I Do Not Play Sports”

  1. Blogger QOS  on January 28, 2005 4:20 PM  

    the other day a stranger called me "graceful".
    everyone in my office busted out laughing.
    i feel your pain.

  2. Anonymous Anonymous  on January 28, 2005 4:23 PM  

    I'm going to assume you are ok before I make any comments.

    With that being said, what does that have to do with sports? Michael Jordan probably would have slipped on a patch of ice, and albeit slid more quietly and more graceful, but still.

    Does this mean you don't go tobogganing down a hill with your brother?

  3. Anonymous Anonymous  on January 29, 2005 2:23 AM  

    Icy? Sports shouldn't involve exposure to cold. Wait-nothing in life should involve exposure to cold!

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

cookies for troops


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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