True Fact:

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1. People love me.

Four cups of venti chai, a sushi dinner and chinese food were all proffered as gifts of love last night. Though I was practically bleeding chai by the end of the night, it nice to know that people love me that much.

2. Leftover sushi is good for breakfast.

How cool is it to sit there and eat sushi while everyone is drinking the disgusting Maxwell House coffee? Besides, it makes you look very hardcore.

3. Everday I am becoming more like Queen-Of-Slackers.

Even after my sushi I was hungry, so I ordered some fattening chipped beef on toast. Someone was foolish enough to point out the fact I had just eaten. So?! I AM STILL HUNGRY! ARE YOU SAYING I AM FAT?! ARE YOU SAYING I AM GOING TO GET FAT?! NO?! Good. Then shut the hell up.

4. Falling out of bed half an hour before you have to be at work, is not such a good idea.

That means no time for Starbucks when you desperately need it, after working roughly thirty hours in the past two days. That means leaving your linen pants slightly wrinkled. And that means being MORE grumpy than usual.

5. Throwing temper tantrums will get you your way.

Especially when it is accompanied by lots of arm waving, talking fast and injured expressions. YOU WILL GET YOUR WAY. They really aren't sure what to do with a female who DEMANDS that they do things. And secretely, they like it, a tiny bit.

6. Wherever my sisters go, people think they are hot.

I think that pretty much speaks for itself. Oh, Barbie. You need to go see Kevin in Honda, he is eagerly awaiting your visit so he can take you out to dinner, send you flowers and be the perfect gentleman. Otherwise, he knows he will have a four-inch heel in his ass.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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