I Am A Complete And Total Loser

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Because, not only do the people at Blockbuster know my name, not only do they herald me as The Queen Of Restocking Fees, but they don't even ask for my card. THEY PULL MY ACCOUNT UP BY MEMORY!

I think they have started briefing the new employees as to who I am. "There is this pathetic single girl who will come in every so often and take out the whole store. She will not return the DVD's for two months. But. No worries. Her cats didn't eat her. She will eventually bring them back. And by the time she brings them back, YOU WILL KNOW FROM MEMORY WHICH ONES ARE LATE. Ladies and gentlemen, this is your friend, she is paying for your college."

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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