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Hoof And Mouth Disease

Published 28.3.05 by Porkchop | E-mail this post

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I would like to flatter myself and think that my three-day blogging hiatus was greatly noticed, prehaps even grieved, but since I cannot pull the wool over even MY own eyes, I will explain where I was to the casually interested reader. Even if they were wishing I were dead.

I will first set your worries aside. I did not run away and join the circus. Or run away and get married to TheNavyDudeWhoIAmSeriouslyConsideringGettingProfessionallyKilled. Nor did I eat myself into a pork-rind induced oblivion. Or getting drunk of my haunches. (Do porkchops have haunches?) Porkchop spent her long weekend being very sick. Very sick. And cleaning the house. Porkchop is still sick, actually, but the rest of the office is out on vacation and sick, so she dragged her porky arse to work. I would like three gold stars, please!

The house is sparkling, I am coughing pitifully and the cookie tins are full.



Yes. That sums up my sad little weekend.

3 Responses to “Hoof And Mouth Disease”

  1. Blogger DBFrank  on March 28, 2005 9:09 AM  

    Sorry to hear you are ill!
    Here is one star. Multiply it by three.
    Stars

  2. Blogger Porkchop  on March 28, 2005 9:54 AM  

    See! Case in point! PORKCHOP COULD DIE AND NO ONE WOULD NOTICE!

  3. Blogger The Fred  on April 05, 2005 2:45 PM  

    Where the hell is my car?? You were supposed to be home monday night.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

cookies for troops


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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