I have not changed my name, yet again. Nor would I give myself such a calorie-indulgent name. And NO, I am NOT obsessed with food. Though I know I would lead you to believe otherwise.
That charming monkier was given to me by a New York cop.
Yes, I have this lovely little knack with running into the law. But I meant to. Really. REALLYIDID!
Since my train happened to be a mere hour and a half late and the person who was supposed to be picking me up was lost in the Bronx, I thought it would be wise to get directions from a friendly person. Friendly Person In New York. Yes, I was born yesterday.
I found a rather gruff and harried policeman who was giving onehundredandseventythree tourist directions how to get to Madison Square. Not wanting to harass him, I meekly asked where to find parking. (Batting your eyelashes never hurts.) When it became abundantly apparent I had NO IDEA what I was talking about nor did I have any idea WHERE I wanted to go, he plucked the cell phone from my hands and proceeded to give the harried driver directions OUT of the slums and where to pick me up. He also announced that he was going to personally escort me out to the corner where I was to be picked up.
When he handed me my phone back, he asked me where the driver was from. Conneticut.
"He said Y'all. Anyone who says Y'all from Conneticut is a cupcake."
I smothered a laugh and informed him with the utmost seriousness I would pass the message along.
He then questioned me as to where I call home.
"Delaware? You are most definately a cream puff."
Light and fluffy? Bad for the waist line? DEVOID OF NUTRITIONAL VALUE?
I was not about to begrudge the nickname since he carried my HUGE suitcase up three flights of stairs for me and warded off drunks, bums and creeps for about twenty minutes. Until Cupcake arrived.
Protect and serve. The pastries are now safe.
He was just trying to pick you up.
or get a tip.
he was definately flirting...great story...
Um, he was, like, old. As in, old enough to be my Dad.
He was just being nice!
While I am not sure about the truthfulness of the first statement. I can attest to the accuracy of the second.
*large bridge approaching*
"If that is not the George Washington Bridge than I am completely and totally lost, have no idea where to go and you will get to start walking."
And how do you know I didn't get mugged? I was just too kind to show you the bruises, so you wouldn't feel bad and all. What I said was that I wasn't RAPED.
Difference. Thank you.