Yesterday's Terrifying Moment


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When the used car manager gazed into my eyes and told me:

"Wow. You are so perfectly beautiful."


Now. Please understand, I believe this guy has daughters my age. He is never scarce on the compliments, he has also told me that "there isn't anything he wouldn't do for me". And just yesterday he was expressing his belief that I could possibly make a gay man go straight.

Yesterday, I JOKINGLY threatened to cry if he did not appraise one of my customers trade-ins at a high enough value. This launched him into a ten-minute speech about how he would NEVER MAKE ME CRY.

(Our Used Car Dealership is rather infamous for under-appraising trades, thus making it more difficult to make a deal go through.)

The other female salesperson has finally noticed that I never complain about getting too little on my trades. So. Logically, she thinks I am sleeping with the used car manager and she wanted to get in on a little bit of the action. As if!

To her, I replied with a scoff:

"Sleeping your way to the top is a cheap ploy for those who are not skilled enough to get a man to do what they want with a mere glance. You, my friend, are a mere amateur. Sleep away! But, if your sex is as bad as you say it is, I will probably get more on my trades, fully clothed, than you will, completely naked."


1 Responses to “Yesterday's Terrifying Moment”

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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