Age Old Problem

Published 21.10.04 by Porkchop | E-mail this post

This morning, I was informed that my attendance will be expected at the office Christmas party, which leaves me with the timeless problem of having no one to bring. Which whittle my options down to a: bring Fred and watch him dance half-drunk on the bar. Problem being; they will not serve alcohol to minor's so that eliminates the entertaining dance.

B: bringing a random bum of the street. Problem being; I am sure my office mates will try and strike up conversation, which could prove challenging. Besides, they love hearing the details of my love life (or lack thereof, seeings as I am the only single one in the office) and will most certainly want to know our most romantic story.

C: bring my sister. Problem being; they might think I am a incestious lesbian, which is not exactly the image I was looking to cultivate.

D: going alone. SEE PROBLEM IN B. I AM THE ONLY SINGLE PERSON IN MY OFFICE. Or not.

Skipping Christmas anyone?

1 Responses to “Age Old Problem”

joy on October 21, 2004 4:32 PM

You know, I would commiserate with you but I don't even have a holiday party to attend. However, I will gladly, cheerfully, etc., skip this holiday and any other you desire. For that matter, how about we skip the next year and a half of our lives.

This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

Age Old Problem

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