I Have Never Eaten So Much Food In A Weekend

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As usual, wherever QOS is present the good times and grease flow. Eating every half hour is what keeps us busy and happy. We stupidly forgot to eat before church, so we sat near the back, eating visitors pumpkin bread with our fingers.

But, the night before there was a food extravaganza. The fair! Oh, how happy she was. How happy we all were to see her so happy! We suited up in our best trailer trash looks possible. She in her lace-up-the-side jeans and I in my trashy cleavage flashing halter top. We. Were. Ready. Of course, the added touch of my nephew attached to our hip/hand/back definitely cemented our image as trailer queens. There were fried twinkies, corndogs, lemonade, funnel cakes and caramel apple sundaes. The next day was slightly less saturated, but not necessarily less frequent. I would like to say I don't need to eat for a week, but I woke up this morning ravenously hungry.

When I offered her breakfast as she walked out the door, she graciously declined and simply said "I have to stop for coffee, I'll just pick myself up a half dozen doughnuts."

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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