Porkchop Is A Musically Uneducated Idiot


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My step-brother is a rather quiet fellow, whenever we visit, it is a rather silent experience. Lots of nodding of the head and non-smiling. He thinks I am a little vapid, girly and generally not worth actually having a conversation with. I vainly try to prove him wrong, while thinking he is quiet, non-talkative and needs to make a BIT MORE GODDAMNED EFFORT! He does not listen to any modern music, only classic rock bands. He has literally never heard of them. And I know very few classic rock bands.

But, we do share in common the fact we love horror movies. After discussing upcoming horror movies as much as we could, conversation drifted to a halt. I complimented him on his very cool vintage rock tee which had some vague face on it. So, I was all "Fab Bob Marley shirt!"



"Um, Porkchop, this is Jimi Hendrix."


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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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