This Is What I Think Of People Who Run Off And Get Significant Others And Are Suddenly Too Important To Talk To Us


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"they just dove headfirst into the shallow end of the pool called SUCKYNESS"

"they jumped feet first into the pit of quicksand called douchebaggery"

"they just bellyflopped into the shark invested waters of McFuckerville"

"and if we ever see them, HI-YAH!!!! FUCKSIAN!!! and we'll whip out our poisoned chopsticks"


3 Responses to “This Is What I Think Of People Who Run Off And Get Significant Others And Are Suddenly Too Important To Talk To Us”

  1. Anonymous QOS 

    See, that's the REAL reason that the Cute Attorney and I broke up. . .

  2. Anonymous Vulgar Wizard 

    Amen.

  3. Anonymous bekah 

    i love this post.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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