I Love Small Children

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For once, I am not being facecious. Last night, I had four children under the age of seven, making a quadruple batch of cookies and we had an absolute blast.

I love being the nice Auntie who lets them do whatever their hearts desire and then send them home, filled with caffeine and sugar to their mothers who quickly withdraw any sort of gratefulness they had extended.

Four spoons, eight hands, globs of cookie dough everywhere, mouth spewing chocolate chips and the children were sneezing, coughing, hacking and stirring with their hands which had been only God Knows Where.

And I am feeding them to my unsuspecting coworkers who think it is just charming that I would spend an evening with small children in such constructive activities.

Perhaps, I have found my calling in life. Using small children to unwittingly kill people.

4 Responses to “I Love Small Children”

  1. Blogger VDOprincess 

    Pictures! We want pictures!

  2. Blogger QOS 

    Small children + death = Children of the Corn.

    You must see that movie.

  3. Blogger Rick 

    always try to have a small kid around somewhere. never need a napkin (wipe stuff on their heads - they love that), and you can blame any biological smellage on them being nearby ("eeww, who did that? that kid!").

  4. Blogger steelcowboy 

    Having two kids of my own, I can only add that children were given to us to teach us PATIENCE

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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