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Is He Worthy?

Published 9.3.05 by Porkchop | E-mail this post

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I have obtained a copy of the aforementioned Man-Who-Should-Date-A-Blonde-Version-Of-Me resume. Here are a few highlights for you to peruse to see if he is worthy of dating PageantBarbie.

Has been a bodyguard to Billy Grahmn, Whoopi Goldburg, Kevin Costner and Gloria Estafan.

Speaks fluent German.

Has Top Secret Clearance with the government.

Plays the organ and piano.


There are a bunch of other interesting facts, but I think he sounds diverse enough to date her. I am very much enjoying this whole having-the-upper-hand in screening people. Forget Googling people. This is SO much more fun.


Input?

1 Responses to “Is He Worthy?”

  1. Blogger Porkchop  on March 09, 2005 7:54 PM  

    While I appreciate the concern there TSG, The Porkchop was not rejected. The Porkchop throws up a little bit in the back of her mouth at the thought of dating a guy SEVENTEEN years older than her.

    Maybe he IS an aryan freak. But, we have been known to date just for the story material. And this definately seems like the PageantBarbie fetish type.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

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I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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