Getting My Backswing In Shape

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For those baby seals.

This morning as I walked out the door I asked my sister if I looked alright. It's more complicated than looking nice. I have to look alluring and hip for the younger customers, professional and smart for the older customers and non-threatening and informative for the middle-aged.

I guess it worked. Today was a good day.

However. I feel like I'm the main character in a mafia movie. The sweet innocent girl slowly becoming corrupt, like the proverbial boiled frog.

Heh! Who are we kidding here?!

My boss walked into my office right before I left "nice work on the slaughter of all those baby mammals." I also happened to make the comparison of my boss to a pimp. I'm selling my smile and myself and he whores me out.

Today I was charming, I was beautiful, I was sucessful. I sold, I slaughtered, I skinned. I flirted, I finagled, I financed. Ok. I'll stop with the corny alliteration now. My point being, I did my job and I did it well. I impressed my managers and suprised myself.

And you know what? It wasn't bad at all.

1 Responses to “Getting My Backswing In Shape”

  1. Anonymous jon37 

    You are falling into the depths...
    get out now before you lose your soul forever!!!!!

    no, just kidding

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.

the past


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