That's the thing about boyfriends. They always manage to ruin everything. Perhaps it is the girls they are dating and they company I keep, but it seems that they always end up MODIFYING OUR PLANS.

Take into consideration, tonight. A friend of mine who lives down in the middle of godforsakennowhere Virginia with lots of rednecks, watermen and other assorted creatures was going to drag me to some seafood festival as entertainment. Yes. That is correct. She was bringing me along so she could watch me chew up and spit out the aforementioned creatures, just for the fun of it.

I don't know who is more twisted, me or her.

But. In any event. This whole fabulous evening of creature and crustacian chewing was RUINED when her boyfriend informed her he might want to do something with her tonight.

Granted, watching me carry out a shock and awe campaign on the idiots of the lower shore might not be exactly fascinating, but it has GOT to beat sitting at home, HOPING your boyfriend might stumble in for some drunken sex.


Or perhaps I just think to highly of myself.