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Natural Selection Clearly Isn't Working

Published 8.10.07 by Porkchop | E-mail this post

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I'm sitting here on the world's longest conference call ever. This is with owners of other businesses, people who are supposedly smart and successful. People who should know how to use a mute button. Or, simply log into the call.

But no, we have wasted at least twenty minutes explaining to people how to log into the call, how to use mute buttons and how to generally do the things you learn to do IN THE FIRST TWO WEEKS ON A JOB. As in the first two weeks on a job STRAIGHT OUT OF COLLEGE.

People. Seriously. Use the mute button. I do not want to hear your dog barking, your kids singing or your heavy breathing.

I find it amazing you manage to cross the street safely on your own.

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This odd narrative is my life. I ended up in Pittsburgh, of all places--from the beach. I have no hobbies, other than cooking excessively and eating microwave popcorn. I enjoy shopping, the Food network, hiding the remote so the Food network cannot be turned off, find ethnic food stores and restaurants and reading voraciously. My life is decidedly pedestrian.

cookies for troops


I worked in the car business where I was required to be ruthless and soul-less wench, which is when I started this project. Since then, I've kept it up because secretly, I've always wanted to join the military. Every male in my mother's family has joined and I quietly entertain thoughts of joining. I haven't yet and don't know if I ever will, but sending the troops cookies keeps me sane. it makes me think I still have a shred of human kindness left in my withering soul. it's a small way for me to salute the men and women who are brave enough to fight for freedom. And makes me feel like I'm contributing toward troop morale--even if I'm not. So if you want to help, send me addresses of troops you know stationed overseas. you may also contribute toward the cost of chocolate chips, but don't feel obligated, that link is here only by request.


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