I cannot believe it, I am very angry. I got a C in A&P II. A freaking C!!! 78.5% I think now would be the opportune time to go kill myself. Grr.

On a happier note, this guy came through drive-thru... Tuesday! And, he was kinda staring at me, which is nothing new, so I ignored him. Well, about 20 minutes later, there is this call for me, which was really weird because my family always calls my cell. I get to the phone and this voice is like "you don't know me but I just came through the drive thru..." (at this point I thought it was going to be a customer who was going to tell me how great it was that I was so cheerful). And he goes on to say that if I don't have a boyfriend, he would like to take me out some time. Well, it so suprised me, that I gave him my number just to get him off the phone.

So, he calls me later, and we talked for like.... half an hour, and he is really nice, blah, blah, blah. And then he called the next day, blah, blah. Well, we went to a movie last night, and he is a really great, really sweet guy.

A couple of funny things. First of all, I couldn't remember what he looked like from drive-thru, so I had this horrifying feeling he was going to be terribly ugly. (He isn't! In fact, he is quite adorable, dresses reasonably well for a guy from around here and has cute dimples!) Secondly, I couldn't remember his name to save my life! He told me like four times, but you know how awful I am at remembering names. So, the girls helped me out in this elaborate plan to discover his name without seeming rude. When he came to the door, Laura bounded (yes, bounded) up to the door and cheerily introduced herself and then asked his name, loudly. =) Turns out that he didn't remember what I looked like and thought Laura was me. So, we're even.

Anyway, we really had a blast. He kinda reminds me of Dad in that he can talk and talk about anything for any amount of time. So, we talked through the whole movie. Thankfully, there were no people in the theater to get mad at us.

Just to fill you in, he is a chicken farmer... is 20... drives a mustang... and his psyco Mom left when he was younger...

I don't want to go on forever, but he is a really sweet, great, nice guy who treats me like a lady, which is nice for a change. Instead of COMING AWAY WITH SMASHED AND SLASHED DIGETS! Oh! That reminds me, it was great! I did not think of Jared the whole time. UNLIKE my date with Cody.... grr. Something about dating a teddy bear did not appeal to me. *shudders and hides under her desk*

Joy has insisted I update my blog, and say "Hello, I am happier than I was last time I posted, please don't worry about me!"

So, I am updating, but I don't know if that is necessarily true, because I can't remember what I last posted. =)

I guess I am happier, but some stuff still is really annoying. Will not say anything specific.

So there, you have a update.

Goodbye To You

Of all the things I've believed in
I just want to get it over with
Tears form behind my eyes
But I do not cry
Counting the days that pass me by

I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
It feels like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend
And I said,

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems that I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light
But it's not right

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you
But I'm not giving in this time

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

And when the stars fall
I will lie awake
You're my shooting star

I love this song! Especially right now. Especially right now as I feel like the most lonely, single solitary human in the entire world.
I am so happy for Laura, she is absolutely glowing, and it sucks to think that I was once like that, and now look at me. I hope, if things (God forbid) do have to end, that they will end slightly better for her.
Joy isn't taken, but most definately not single. And she always has backup at least five deep.
Brittany, Crystal, Hannah, Maria, and everyone else have someone to think they are special and beautiful. Why can't I?
Argh. I will just be... really, really great, and really, really beautiful, and really, really sucessful, and make everyone wish I were theirs. sigh. sob. sniffle

Why, oh why, does life have to hurt? Interestingly enough, we were just discussing in class that life is made out of change, and change hurts, and that's why life is painful. I HATE PAIN! I HATE CHANGE! I HATE LIFE!

I know people don't mean to hurt you, and they don't want to hurt you, blah blah blah. But guess what, they do! Like it or not! IT SUCKS!!

In case you haven't guessed I am sitting in a little shriveled heap in front of my computer, with a pile of used and shredded kleenex, bawling my eyes out. Like I said SUCKS TO BE ME.
BUT! I willo live life relentlessly and without regrets. I will not look back, and I will be adventerous, spontanious and fun! And a flirt! I am going to have a fuuuuuun summer. ;)

You should see me now, I am rather disappointed because I wanted to look nice while Steph and I checked out cute guys while we were out today. Instead I look like a Miss Texas runner up. Make that Miss Tex-Ass. I tanned just a wee bit too long today, so instead of looking like a toasted marshmallow, I look like a fried pig. My hair is blonde and frizzy, my stupid nails are atrocious looking, and they inhibite my typing most terribly. And I am dressed in head-to-toe denim. Wearing a bra with this sunburn is quite painful.

Anyway, tonight is going to be fun. I love fun people and doing fun things!!

I am so tired!

Tired enough to bypass going to the Cress's in favor of staying home to study and sleep. Truely a rare accorance for me to choose studying as oppsed to socializing.

Today was the LONGEST day at work. The trainee from hell got even more hellish, and I do believe they are going to fire her, or switch her to the night crew. I felt bad, as a trainer, but hey, there is only so much you can do. You cannot make a person learn...

I am so tired, and my brain is on overload. I cannot type any longer.